BIO
Hi there! I’m going to forego the third person voice on my own website… because, after all, this is me sharing teeny bits about my life and/or art practice. By nature, I’m a very private person, more so with the explosion of social media. I crave quiet time, solitude for reflection, and I was born last century—so the word friend is a living practice with a small group of individuals in my life who reciprociate and mirror sharved values; the term is not merely an imposed social media construction. I have a lot of acquaintances—professional and personal—and I am so thankful to cross paths with so many talented, kind, and generous people. But I want to honor the folks who journey with me in deeply meaningful ways.
As for my practice, yes, I put a lot of myself into my works and this critical ingredient commingles with many other fictional components. Like other artists, I’ve had the unfortunate experience of audience/reader/witness sometimes assuming I am 100% my character(s) or that my fictional works are purely autobiographical. It creates a distortion in the real (organic) world with acquaintances. If I didn’t feel protective over my loved ones, it wouldn’t be an issue. But how someone perceives me and treats me in person can adversely affect my intimates too. So, yeah, I like my privacy. (Plus—hello—identity theft!)
My pronouns are she/they. My use of “they” signifies my genderqueerness. But they also calls into any space I inhabit all of my ancestors who travel with me—who show up in unexpected, necessary, and beautiful ways in my artistic offerings. My ancestors are from all over the world, including parts of West Africa (pointing toward the horrific era of the Atlantic slave trade). I think of those great ancestors from seven generations ago, still present in my blood; and although their pigmentation is not legible in my güera skin—I acknowledge them and carry them in other obvious ways. I aim to cultivate their presence, strength, and sacrifices in what I do and in how I carry myself in this world. So while it is true that my ancestors are primarily from Indigenous México and the imperial nation-state of Spain… . I know myself to be Xicana/x with roots from many parts of the world. Culturally, I’m firmly planted in this hemisphere, even if my peoples were colonized in Northeast México/South Texas multiple times.
I grew up in the Payaya Territories (san antonio, tx), and despite the ongoing poverty and multiple “isms” that adversely affected my/our lives… we had a great source of love in our mamá. That’s the kernel, by the way. Why I have never turned my back on my communities… because it would be an immense betrayal to my mother and all of her sacrifices. (Who made it possible for you to be here?)
The ongoing erasure policies of texas ensured that it would take me years to discover my people’s untold histories. This is why as an ever-evolving Two Spirit, genderqueer, Xicana/x, lesbiana feminist artist my entire artistic trajectory of thirty years has centered characters/stories from Xicana Indigenous Lesbians, Two Spirit & LGBTQ+ folks, Womxn of Color, and other historically aggrieved communities. I aspire to be in lineage with those queer womxn of color who made it possible for me to be an audacious OUT lesbian in the mid-90’s when it was considered “career suicide.” What many well-meaning heterosexuals didn’t comprehend is that living in my skin authentically prevented me from actual suicide. so there’s that… and while many more folks are accepting of jotería, today, identifying as “Xicana/x” is still considered “career suicide.”
So, aquí estamos… and despite the naysayers, prior to embracing filmmaking, I was a prolific theater artist/producer. I am the Founding Artistic Director of Cara Mía Theater Co. in Dallas, TX. At the time it was dedicated to Chicano theater, literacy, and educational programs. After I left the company in the capable hands of founding board member, Eliberto González, and invited Marisela Barrera (a talented local teatrista) to serve as Artistic Director, I began to focus more on openly queer teatro and queer Chicana solo performance. My meeting and training under Cherríe L. Moraga and Celia Herrera Rodríguez eventually led me to Xicana and rooted my solo comedies in the indigenous principles of sacred clowning. But this Queer Xicana Theatre career only happened because I learned to self-produce.
In 2012, I transferred those teatro self-producing skills and shifted most of my artistic energy to independent filmmaking. (The ongoing digital revolution had created an opening for artists like me.) Along with Marisa Becerra, we co-founded AdeRisa Productions. The independent company has been a vehicle for us and our collaborators to grow artistically as filmmakers/ screenwriters/ artists/ community members. Since the company’s inception, we devised and implemented a holistic production work-model, which includes bringing a spiritual elder onto set: nancy Chargualaf martin. I am elated to witness that segments of the filmmaking community also believe in creating non-toxic production spaces.
I continue to create original works, mentor artists, show up as a teaching artist, and commit to meaningful collaborations with fellow artists in various mediums. I acknowledge my teachers along my journey, especially Prof. Patrick Kelley, Cora Cardona, Cherríe L. Moraga, Celia Herrera Rodríguez, Ruth Atkinson, and nancy Chargualaf martin. These are individuals who poured their time, talents, resources, and wisdom into me. None of us arrives at art-making and/or community building alone… that’s anathema to our purpose together. In this way, my fellow collaborators over the years also merit my love, respect, and gratitude. So do my peers and the many artists who continue to inspire me. There are also friends and community members who have championed my works—they too contribute to this artistic life practice.
Finally, regardless of genre or medium, my/our artistic works are presented as offerings. They may or may not speak to you. But something in the project was screaming in me, needed to be created. I remain grounded as a cultural worker and understand the responsibility my ancestors entrusted me with in this life. I am in awe of how much the artmaking has helped and continues to heal me/us. One day I will greet them en el otro lado… where I hope to say the words, WE did our best.
May you be blessed. May you too feel yourself held. Tlazocamati for reading.